Where are all the Tiki Bars going? If you haven't noticed, all the Tiki Bars in Southern California are closing. Why? To many reasons to count, but there are still some good ones left. Check out the link to critiki.com below to find a good Tiki Bar near you. George Bush declared that no one in America is hungry because hunger is now called "food insecurity." Thank God W is looking out for the 35 million Americans who don't get enough to eat everyday. Sunshine has a great idea for all those old and fat people riding the electric wheelchairs.....cocktail holders! We also send out a plea to get our friend Amy a date.

Click HERE for a Tiki Bar near you!.

Drink of the Week
Bangkok Banger Deux
3oz Sprite
3oz Cherry Juice
1oz Vodka
1/2oz Gin
1/2oz Light Rum
1/2oz Grand Marnier
Add Sprite to tall glass. In a shaker combine vodka, gin, rum, cherry juice and grand marnier and shake with ice. Pour slowly over Sprite, keeping a layer of clear bubbly on the bottom. Garnish with a strawberry and parasol.

Sunshine has returned from his week in the WOODS. And what a wonderful romp through nature it was. Plenty of creatures, trees, campfires and lets not forget the cocktails. Think its hard to take your tiki bar with you when away from home? Poppycock! Sunshine tells you how to pack up a mini tiki bar when on the road, even when camping. Pumpkin found some interesting info on the very very gay Christmas scents of Elton John. Yes thats right, your home can now smell like Elton Johns home during the holidays. Just don't ask us what the secret ingredients are in his magical holiday candles.

Drink of the Week
Classic Bay Breeze
2oz Vodka
3oz cranberry juice
3oz pineapple
crushed ice
pour vodka and juice over ice, stir and get toasted

The entire country is in political chaos. You didn't notice? Well put that cocktail down for a moment and read a paper. Better yet read some news from outside our fun little part of the world. Our own media won't tell it like it is, but we will. Just to make sure this episode isn't to heavy for you we also delve into the some very important issues like pleated pants, Taco Bell horse meat and retarded commercials. Our drink this week is sure to make you feel all warm an cozy on a cool Autumn evening.

Drink of the Week
Spiked Apple Cider
1-2oz 100 proof cinnamon schnapps
4-6oz Organic apply juice or cider
Bring your apple cider to a nice boil, pour into the tiki mug of your choice and add your schnapps. Sip carefully, the beverage you are about to enjoy will knock you on your ass.

Sunshine gets a facial, keep your minds out of the gutter. Skin care is very important. Staying young is easier than you think. Who are you voting for? Did you vote? Sunshine and Pumpkin speak their minds about the current midterm election. Sip a Bangkok Banger while listening.

Drink of the Week
Bangkok Banger
2oz lemon lime soda
4oz cherry juice
1oz lemon vodka
1oz concord wine
Pour soda into champagne flute. In shaker combine cherry juice, vodka and wine. Shake with ice, and slowly pour into glass.

Pumpkin has dreams/nightmares of John Stewart and Wanda Wisdom. Sunshine is attacked by eye boogers and can't dial his phone. Bill Clinton goes to the bathroom and racist Granny takes over the world. Well not really, but what would the world be like if old people ran the world? Pumpkin also comes to the conclusion that she can solve all her holiday shopping woes by selling all the old jewelery from ex boyfriends.

Drink of the Week
Pear Cider
6oz sparkling pear cider
1/2oz sour apple schnapps
1/2oz midori
1oz vodka
In a tall glass pour over ice, midori, vodka and schnapps. Stir lightly. Pour pear cider over top and give one more stir.

George Bush has done it now. After shipping all of our good American jobs over to China and various other foreign countries, he just won't be happy till we are all out of work. The makers of the original pink lawn flamingo is closing its factory due to high costs of production. What does this mean for those of us who may need a plastic flamingo in an emergency? Only bad. Sunshine gives a few tips for getting your flamingo, throwing a great holiday tiki party and some very tacky decor to go with.

Drink of the Week
Bluesberry Cocktail
1 .5oz Apple vodka
1/2oz Grand Marnier
4oz blueberry juice
Put all ingredients in shaker with ice, shake well and pour in a martini glass.